Make Room

I’m pumping gas on my way home. Black night, 25 degrees, a mean wind that licks you cold on the cheeks. No gloves. At six months pregnant, I can button but the top two buttons of my puffer coat.

I aim for $15 in the tank.

I’ve just left church, the warmth of my Mom-group Bible study, where we’ve nibbled banana crumble muffins and sipped decaf and talked about Psalms. The psalms, the same songbook Jesus sang from; but mostly, we’ve talked about those wet spaghetti things we call feelings. About how we are rational creatures, but also relational creatures, and God itches for us to climb up into His lap, for us to be candid about every heart twinge, cloudy doubt, and sea squall of the soul.

Candy Heart

Every note, we agree, is a precious key on the piano. Yes. God can handle any song we pound out.Continue Reading

Mom: This Year, You’re Not Getting a Card


My soul curls up in the corners when I buy greeting cards. Something in me balks at the convention, the grocery store rack of suggested sentiments, the playing GO FISH. Pluck one out. Crack it open. Scan, shake my head, set it back. Over and over until I find a match. A skeleton key. A few lines that unlock, sort of, the […]

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How to Love Someone Who’s Gone


Can I tell you a quick story? Last summer, shortly after the book was contracted, I spent the weekend at our family’s little lake cottage, just an hour south of Rochester. I remember sitting at the kitchen table with my mom that afternoon. We’d just finished lunch, and our plates were stacked into a neat tower within the sink. The banana peppers were back in the […]

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And This: God Gives to The Naughty List


It’s 7 a.m. and I tell Patrick to get my slippers. I poke my feet out from the sheet at the side of the bed, wiggle my toes, shiver-saying, Brr, they’re cold. He pans the floor, finds the pair, stands up, slippers me, but backward. “Other way, Doodle.” I shake one back down to the floor. […]

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The Bravest Prayer


I put a premium on honesty, and on your time, so this year’s turkey missive will be mercifully bare and brief: Does your heart feel a bit fuzzy, like it’s swaddled in too much cloud cover, like you can’t bring it close enough to the surface? Like it’s thick, like it’s feeling full-time, so sore for friends […]

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